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Their goal is to strip you of your support network, and thus your strength—so that you will be less likely or able to stand up against them whenever they want to "win." 2. Criticism, like isolation, is also something that can start small.In fact, someone may try to convince themselves that their partner's criticism of them is warranted, or that their partner is just trying to help them be a better person.In healthy relationships, communication about those needs leads to a workable compromise. Of course you will trust someone you've dated for five years more than you trust the person you've been seeing for a month.In controlling ones, the person needing the alone time is made out to be a villain or denied the time altogether, taking away yet another way they can strengthen themselves. But some amount of trust should be assumed or inherent within the relationship.In fact, some controlling partners are acting out of a sense of emotional fragility and heightened vulnerability, and may perhaps show traits of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria.
Whether controlling behavior leads to more severe emotional or physical abuse or not, it is not a healthy situation.And they may keep "evidence" of your wrongdoing to a point that you may feel they've got a whole case against you—even if you don't quite understand it.From where you put their favorite coffee mug to whether you had lunch with a coworker without them knowing, you will always be assumed to have had criminal motives. To use it as justification for punishing you in some way, or preemptively trying to keep you from making that "error" again—to keep you acting in ways they want you to. Getting you so tired of arguing that you'll relent. Maybe it's cultural traditions or your view of human nature.Specifically, they create an expectation of you giving something in return, or a sense that you feel beholden to that person because of all they've given you.
This can make it more emotionally and logistically difficult to escape when further warning bells go off. Spying, snooping, or requiring constant disclosure. A controlling partner typically feels that they have the right to know more than they actually do.A partner who views every interaction you have as being flirtatious, is suspicious or threatened by multiple people you come in contact with, or faults you for innocent interactions because they may be "leading someone on" may be insecure, anxious, competitive or even paranoid. It's another way of sapping your strength: making you feel guilty for time you need on your own to recharge, or making you feel like you don't love them enough when you perhaps need less time with them than they need with you.