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24-Sep-2020 04:03

I went to a secondary school that was predominantly West African and attended a university that was predominantly white, so my choices were wide and I dated a few of those choices.

In fact I wasn’t into my own culture as much because I grew up along a lot of other nationalities, in what I call “London culture”.

Some responses:“Love is love.” Jennifer (23), Angolan“I would only prefer to date a Congolese man because we both understand each others cultures.

The connection is just better because we can relate in many ways since we’ve had a similar upbringing.” Sarah (24), Congolese“I love my Ghanaian brothers, especially those who can speak my tribal language. Especially when telling jokes, it just doesn’t sound the same in English.” Nana (24), Ghanaian“I will be with anyone as long as they are compatible to me and I’m attracted to them. I’m British.” Christopher (28), Nigerian“As long as they are not Jamaican.” Bijoux (28), Congolese“Dating someone from your own background has far more positives than dating someone from another background, such as cultural understanding, speaking the same language etc. I’ve brought a Nigerian, Jamaican and Congolese home.

Language “The problem is language; it’s the major issue” 36-year-old Alexi from Congo told me.

“For most of us English is not our first language, we think in our mother tongue then translate it into English.

You can be assured that our pool of singles is as diverse and impressive as the United States itself.

It was for this reason that I began to look for like-minded guys who were also from my own culture, guys I could relate to. I know my family would be pleased if I brought home a Congolese man, but what if I do so to my own detriment? Love blinds common sense.”The idea of retiring in a country totally unfamiliar to me is quite daunting and something I know would take a lot of discussion with my future partner, if he happened to have a different country of origin.

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Many question the wisdom of interracial dating, but actually, we seem to have an equally big problem with dating between one African culture and another. Love blinds common sense.”“No Nigerian, Ghanaian or Jamaican man is welcome in my house. Why is it better for me to be with a white man than it is to be with a Nigerian? How many marriages do you know of people from two different African countries that have lasted till old age? I pondered those phrases: “It’s for your own good” and “stick to your own”.

Or rather, we might date outside our own culture but when it comes to marriage we are advised to stick with “our own”. If you’re going to marry a foreigner, marry a white man.”These were the words that fell from my friend’s mother’s mouth when her daughter told her she was dating a Nigerian man because she was tired of Congolese men. ”, said my friend in response, defiantly challenging her mother, to my dismay (anybody knows better than to challenge an African mother! White people “White people don’t have much culture; it’s easy to adapt either way. Was it really for our own good to find our life partners within our own culture?

However, even in Congo a country that boasts a long history of tribalism, there came a time during the Mobutu regime when he encouraged tribes and regions to unite because he understood that a united Congo meant a stronger state.