Women dating older men psychology
Resisting the “cougar” stereotype of older women wearing leopard print, drinking martinis, and ogling younger men, many women share their real stories of how younger men focused on and pursued . I have always dated men my age, and they were so set in their ways, Had so many resentments, hurt, anger etc. Older woman and younger man is the least successful of all pairings.
Researcher Milaine Alarie, in a piece entitled “They're the Ones Chasing the Cougar” (2019) found that contrary to stereotype, very few women considered themselves “seductresses,” pursuing younger men who were “passively waiting to be courted.”[iii] Using data from 55 interviews with women from 30 to 60 years old who date younger men, she found that women were more likely to have played a passive role in forming the relationship when they were over 40 than in their 30s. They seem they are tired of life and just want to sit around.romance, adventure, passion.
Cowan found that both adult and adolescent males, in contrast to females, did not hold a double standard when judging couples with only a 7-year age difference. The man in the piece who experimented with the “young woman trial period” explained that dating a woman only 5 years older than himself was insufficient to create the “emotional maturity and depth” he was searching for. I imagine this author scoffs at the idea of an older man and younger woman, but that is the most successful and longest lasting relationships based on history and statistics.
He preferred women who were a full decade older, explaining they were more self-assured and well rounded, sharing that “Younger women just don't allow me to grow in the ways older women do.” “Chasing the Cougar” Having established that many men prefer older women, how do these relationships develop? That is the practice of nature for most mammalian species.
Alaire suggests that within the context of women-older dating, the ability or desire to “renegotiate the gendered script” that applies to forming relationships is tempered by cultural beliefs.
True Love Is Timeless Brian Collisson and Luciana Ponce De Leon (2018), exploring sources of prejudice towards age-gap relationships, recognize that evolutionary theory holds that younger women should prefer slightly older men and vice versa, in order to maximize reproductive fitness and attainment of resources.[iv] They note that atypical relationships of larger age gaps, particularly when the woman is older, are perceived to violate these established mate preferences. Curr Psychol (2018), https://doi-org.edu/10.1007/s12144-018-9895-6.
Obviously, this is completely flawed because age doesn’t always prevent you from being a terrible person but, as dating apps take over and millennial men becoming increasingly hard to pin down because they’re all too busy nurturing their bromances anecdotally at least, it seems that older men who remember the world before Tinder are having their moment.
We think we know why we’re attracted to older men but is there more to it than we realise? She says that there is scientific evidence which suggests that ‘dad or shag’ is both a psychological and evolutionary phenomenon and not just a cultural cliché.
‘When we ask men and women what aged partner they would prefer, men tend to say that they would like a female partner who is a few years younger and women tend to say that they would like a male partner who is a few years older.The maturity aspect certainly speaks to Daisy’s situation.‘He’s really kind and right on and never a twat compared to some of my friend’s partners, who are their own age’.Some conveyed that the attention of an older woman boosted their own level of confidence and self-esteem. Yes..younger men, like older women.men my age seem like grumpy Grandpa's.
Others recognized that older women have more life experience, emotionally stability, grounding, and can offer both honesty and different perspectives. Older men can get grumpy and negative, that's their only problem.
An age gap can be good, it can be bad and it can be downright creepy.